College can be challenging enough for dedicated students, but attending college as a new mom adds a whole new twist to this academic venture. I hadn’t finished college before my first child was born, but I knew I wanted to complete my degree as soon as possible. Knowing what I wanted to do and finding the resources to accomplish that goal were at times oceans apart from each other.

For close to the first two years of my daughter’s life I was a college student. She sometimes attended classes with me, had her own backpack with toys and books, and was my faithful companion during late-night study sessions. Being a mom and a college student is not an easy task, but if you are committed to both of them, you can be successful at both. I actually found that non-traditional students like myself tended to be more responsible, reliable, and focused at college – we had to be. If you are considering going to college or going back to college as a parent, consider the following ideas that helped me get the degree I wanted (and am still glad I have).

Pick a Program

Make sure that the program you select to pursue is your passion. This advice is for anyone – but parents who go to college most likely don’t have the time or funds for “do overs”. If you are certain you want a college degree, make sure it is something you love and think the job market will reward you for in the near future.

When I first began college I wanted to be a social worker. However, as a new mom I also quickly learned the emotional toll that would take on me, especially understanding my own personality. I also knew that I wanted a degree that would enable me to have job flexibility and utilize my skills and passions. I had also watched friends flounder and eventually leave school because they didn’t have a specific passion or goal they were pursuing. When I reassessed my college goals I asked myself the following questions.

• Will this degree enable me to have employment without further training?
• If something happens to my partner will I be able to use this degree to support my child?
• Will this degree compliment me as a person (and as a mom)?
• Can I afford to go to school full-time and still be an involved mom, both financially and emotionally?
• How will my life be better because of this degree?
• How will my life be more challenging because of college?
• How will my child’s life be different because I am attending college?

Create a College Time Budget

If you think about your time like you think about your finances, you can budget the hours in your day and be less likely to fall into time debt – when you simply don’t have enough hours in the day to be a parent and student.

Consider your class schedule so that you account for 4 basic factors:

1. In-class time
2. Childcare time
3. Home time
4. Homework time

Some semesters I took night-classes 4 evenings each week so that my husband was home with our daughter. I did homework during her naptime as much as I could. Other semesters when this was not possible, I arranged my class schedules so that there were as few hours as possible spent on campus, and the extra hours in between classes were my study breaks. Then when I came home my attention was back on my family.

Consider Online Options Carefully

Way back in the day when I was attending college online classes were not prevalent and not even yet offered in my field. Today they offer many options, but you still need to consider several points.

Make certain that the online classes are from an accredited and recognized university.

If you are looking to supplement with online classes make sure that the credits earned will go toward your on-campus credits.

Don’t assume that college at home as a parent will be infinitely easier than taking on-campus classes. You still need to devote time to classes and homework, and just like being a work-at-home mom, it isn’t always as easy to carve away that time when you don’t physically leave the house.

Make a Homework Plan

My first semester of college as a mom was so much more difficult because I didn’t have a doable plan (unless you consider just waiting until my daughter fell asleep on my shoulder and studying while she slumbered in my arms).

Use in-between hours for homework – those times when you have breaks between classes are valuable minutes that you are already away from home and mom duties.

Consider paying a babysitter for 5 hours each week for homework time. I know the finances can be an issue, but in the long-run you will save your sanity and your grades.

Get creative with what you can do as a mom and student. I would bring my daughter to the library and spend the first half-hour reading and exploring with her, then as she tired put her in a baby-pack and do my own searching.

Host study groups. Toward the end of my college career I had to work on several group projects that required hours of outside collaboration. I invited classmates over and provided an easy meal and we did the studying at my home – allowing me to still participate as a student and as a mom.

Find Flexible Childcare

No matter how creatively you arrange your class schedules, there will most likely be times when you have to find childcare for school responsibilities – either classes, meetings, or finals. Formal daycare settings are not only expensive, but they rarely have the flexibility you need. I was extremely blessed to find a neighbor and friend who could watch my daughter when I had classes.

• Find a neighbor with whom you and your child are already comfortable and ask if they are interested in babysitting occasionally.
• Ask a stay-at-home mom. It can provide her with extra income without being a full-time commitment.
• Check with your college. Many of them have childcare programs for students.

Look for Scholarships

Attending college as a non-trad (non-traditional student) puts you apart from the rest. Look for scholarships where the goal is to support non-trads. Search for organizations like these that are specifically focused on providing funding to moms and single parents.

Is attending college while being a new mom easy? No. Was it the right choice for me? Absolutely. I earned the degree (Technical Writing/Computer Science) that supports my passion and now my ability to be a work-at-home mom. Just make sure the decision is right for you and your family – no one else can make that call for you.

Related posts:

1. How Much is a Mom Worth?
2. Challenges of Being a Working Mom
3. The Wars of the Work-at-Home Mom

As amazing and wonderful as being a stay-at-home mom can be, if you don’t plan for the realities of it the stress and responsibilities can be daunting. Over the years I made my fumbles, but thankfully was, and still am, able to stay home with all of my children and be a part of their everyday lives in ways I just don’t think I could if I had taken that dream job.

The Dreaded Budget and Financial Fears

• If at all possible practice with a single-income budget before you make the move to become a stay-at-home mom. Stash your current paycheck into savings and only use the income provided by your spouse. This will give you a real-world sampling of what it will be like to live on one paycheck.
• Consider which things you can comfortably live without in order to reach your goal of living on a single income. Look for things you can remove the expense of and still find similar benefits elsewhere.
• Cable – check out DVDs from your library instead
• Dinner out once week – go for dinner out once a month or take a picnic somewhere so you still feel like you are getting out
• Winter vacations – consider travelling in off seasons for reduced rates
• Gym membership – get together with moms from the neighborhood to work out together (set days/times for meeting to walk) or look for used equipment for the home
• Wine of the month club – treats like this have the price tag of convenience, so make a trip yourself once month to choose your own treat
• Be ready to clip corners and coupons. I became an expert at searching ads and sale prices and knowing when a bargain is truly a bargain.
• Buy in bulk only when there is not a “best buy” date (unless you have a large family). Things like toilet paper and soap have great shelf lives so stock up when you find rock-bottom prices.
• Buy generic, especially when it comes to your staple items. Stores like Aldi’s carry many household basics at fractions of the cost (and the items often come from the same manufacturers, with different labels thrown on them).
• Find ways to be your own service-person. As the mother of 3 sons (one who grows hair like Sasquatch), I quickly realized that haircuts are one area where I can be the salon manager. I invested $24 in a quality “buzz kit” and found a friend who used to work in a salon to give me some quick lessons. Even if I only cut their hair once each year myself, I had paid for the buzz kit the first time I used it. Other ways you can do the job yourself include:
• Car washing
• Dog grooming
• Manicures/pedicures
• Housecleaning
• Yard maintenance
• Simple home repairs (before we ever consider calling in a repair man we check online – someone somewhere else has always had the same problem and posted their solutions)
• Taxes (it can be intimidating the first year, but you can calm your fears by trying it yourself and then taking it in for review)
• Vehicle maintenance (even my 16 year old daughter has changed the oil in the car)
• Use online resources like Freecycle, Vegsource, FatWallet, and Ebates to make the most of your stay-at-home dollar.

Beyond the Budget: Hurdles for Stay-at-Home Moms

Yes – the finances are an obvious obstacle for parents who want to stay home with their children. However, there are other factors that can become hurdles as well, especially if we don’t go into the situation with both eyes wide open. Staying home with the kids has wonderful benefits, but there can be some hidden dangers along the way. If both partners are not on board with the decision you are setting yourself up for resentment and frustration, and much larger problems down the road.

• Make the budget together so there are no surprises.
• Set aside time to be a couple. You will need this even more once you start spending the majority of your time home with the demands of young children, but your partner will also need to know that you still have time and energy for him.
• Clearly set up the expectations of the household. Your partner might think that you staying home means you take on all of the household responsibilities, 7 days a week. If this is not your intention – be up front with it. Tell him you need him to help with dishes on the weekends or vacuuming on Saturday morning.
• Stay-at-home moms have large workloads that just sometimes go unrealized by partners, but approaching the situation calmly and respectfully is better than just wishing he would help more at bath-time but resenting him because he doesn’t.

Birds of a Feather

Find others who are stay-at-home parents for companionship and compassion (you will give and receive both!). Friends who also stay home with their kids are great resources for budget hints, time-saving strategies, and the latest free concerts for the toddlers on weekday morning. You can also take turns babysitting so each of you get that much needed sanity break (even if it is just to run to the grocery store).

The life of a stay-at-home mom is not very glamorous or sadly, highly respected, in many circles. You need to choose this path because it is your passion and because you truly feel it is right for your family. If you do, maybe in the end you will find that it is your dream job, just like I did.

Related posts:

1. Is Your Child Ready to Stay Home Alone?
2. Coping with the Challenges of a Stay At Home Mom (SAHM)
3. Are All Stay At Home Mom’s Equal?

When my first child was just several months old I did what so many working women do – I stopped breastfeeding because I just didn’t feel capable of doing both. Even though I worked for a very large company, there were no policies for breastfeeding moms, no places in which to discreetly pump during the day, and no extended breaks allowed in order to feed my daughter if she was brought to the office. There were no mothers in my circle of friends and co-workers who breastfed after returning to work, if at all. I felt as if I had failed in that one job that as a mother I was supposed to be able to do.

Breastfeeding, although recommended by the World Health Organization, the American Academy of Pediatrics, and other leading organization as the most complete and best way to feed infants, is still not accepted in so many modern cultures. When it is accepted, it is not always supported and encouraged.

Just as recently as December of 2011, a breastfeeding sit-in was declared in Target stores across America in response to one mother’s reports of ill-treatment after she chose to breastfeed her baby in the store. Employees apparently asked her to move from her spot in the women’s clothing section of the store where she was breastfeeding her baby, completely covered with a blanket, to an even more remote location – a dressing room.

Those who do find offense to breastfeeding appear to be most specifically adverse to it when it is done where they know it is happening. It doesn’t even have to be something that is seen – it can be as innocent as a mother swaddling her baby under a blanket where not even a single tiny toe is visible. The naysayers appear to be afraid that even a glimpse of breast flesh might be seen. Ironic, in a country where you can’t go to the mall without seeing teenagers dressed in less clothing than I wear to the beach, and where movies and television commercials are flooded with more skin than I ever revealed breastfeeding.

The Stigmas of Breastfeeding

In third world countries breastfeeding is a necessity and a completely accepted and encouraged aspect of raising children. However, in industrial nations such as the United States of America, breastfeeding is still looked at as something that is done in large part by 4 groups of moms:

• Throwback hippies (I saw this with all of the love for a generation from which I come)
• Natural pathogen moms who wouldn’t ever consider manufactured foods of any kinds
• Working moms who have more demanding things to do with their time
• Those who are too poor to purchase formula and the necessary supplies

Moms who might consider breastfeeding are often put off by several stereotypes, stigmas, and unfortunate concerns.

• Formula, like wine, is not cheap, especially the good stuff. There is an undercurrent in American society that breastfeeding is something that those who can’t afford formula choose to do.
• Breastfeeding is icky (according to some). There is a stigma that it is gross and perverted to have an infant so dependent on what society has declared to be a purely sexual body part. Our “modernized” society has melded breastfeeding and sexual imagery – two totally separate issues – and has somehow declared breastfeeding in public to be inappropriate. Yet parents can yell at their children during tee-ball games, belittle their children for not doing well enough in school, and ignore their children as they spend more time texting than talking. Somehow our definition of inappropriate has gone askew.
• Breastfeeding reduces your social life. Nothing says “new mom” like when you are out with friends to dinner and a baby nearby begins to cry and you spring a leak in a natural response.
• Breastfeeding your baby means you won’t be able to return to work at full capacity and pursue career goals with vigor.

Yes – there are unfortunately some truths to these stigmas, but only because society hasn’t caught up to reality. They shouldn’t be stigmas and issues that stop moms from providing this wonderful and natural source of nutrition for their babies.

• Breastfeeding does mean restructuring your social life – but so does becoming a parent in general. Good friends at dinner won’t think less of you if you need to pump-n-dump – those who do probably aren’t worth dinner plans anyway.
• Even though the laws are changing, they are still not current with world health opinions and endeavors. Working outside of the home will be more challenging as a breastfeeding mom. You will need to plan ahead and let your employer know how often you will need to pump and work with your employer to find a suitable place to do this and store the milk. It won’t always be easy, but it will be worth your time and your infant’s health and relationship with you. Don’t let it be something you regret like I do.

When my 2^nd child was just days old I became very ill with a high fever and signs of a bacterial infection, and was told I needed to be hospitalized for a round of IV antibiotics. I immediately saw my hopes and plans of breastfeeding for at least the first year of his life begin to fail as I hadn’t even been able to breastfeed long enough to establish a pattern with my newborn – until my stubborn Irish side kicked in and I refused to be admitted to the hospital without my son allowed in my room so I could breastfeed. The hospital staff relented and I was admitted for 3 days of treatment with him at my side.

That baby, and his brothers who followed, were all breastfed for at least the first year of their lives, despite the roadblocks and stigmas that modern society tends to place on the choice. Don’t let the breastfeeding backlash stop you from providing your child with the best nutritional and developmental start possible – even if you aren’t Irish.

Related posts:

1. Using Kangaroo Mother Care to Support Breastfeeding
2. Breastfeeding in Public – How to Make It Work
3. Breastfeeding: Challenging and Really Doable

Parenting is tiring, and is sometimes absolutely exhausting – especially if you are trying hard enough. One of the biggest dangers of overscheduled parents is that the exhaustion can turn into a collapse of everything you have been working so hard to teach, share with, and learn from your children. This balance beam of working hard as a parent and falling asleep and crashing at the wheel is one of my personal demons I have faced as a parent, and have finally found some solutions.

Find the Quiet in Your Days

While I don’t recommend trying this one first, it does highlight the need for parents to experience quiet. I recently asked my husband to just leave me to bask in the winter sunshine of the surprisingly warm cab of his truck parked in our driveway so that I could take a nap, or at least steal a few quiet moments before the barrage of “What’s for dinner? Want to see me yo-yo? Where is my hat?” began. My husband smiled and said sure. I sat for a few moments and then eventually meandered my way to the door, and the barrage. Even those beautiful moments curled on the seat gave me reprieve, but there are some even more practical ways to find quiet in your days.

1. Make a Do Not Disturb sign for the door. If your kids are old enough to monitor themselves for even 15 minutes while you are in a nearby room, clearly explain that when this sign is on the door, this means that Mom needs 15 minutes of quiet. Use it to take an uninterrupted bath, sit on your bed and read a book, or talk on the phone with a friend. Don’t overuse the sign and be sure to give your kids positive attention when you emerge – they will learn that Mom comes out of her personal time-out refreshed and happy.

2. Swap driving time with friends. Sometimes the best quiet time is behind the wheel of the mini-van, driving along and singing to whatever radio station I choose, or just being content with my own thoughts. If you deliver a vanload of children to an activity and then another parent brings them home, you both saved yourself gas money and time, and bought yourself a quiet ride home.

3. Find an errand buddy. This is a great plan, especially because it is valuable from the time your kids are babes until much older (and louder). Set aside a few hours each week where you take turns with each other’s children, perhaps you taking hers on Monday from 2-4 and she takes yours on Thursday from 9-11. You get to grocery shop, go to hair appointments, or just breathe.

4. Install the feet off the floor rule, courtesy of my 92-year-old grandmother. Until her children were graduated she instituted this rule each summer they were home from school, just so she had 30 minutes to an hour of quiet time each afternoon. The rule was that the kids didn’t have to nap, but they had to keep their feet off the floor. Grab a book, a sketch pad, or anything else, and get busy getting quiet. I have used this and it is a great way to get the kids to slow down their own frantic pace as well, I don’t hear the constant thundering in the house, and we all feel recharged afterward.

Become Your Own Best Friend

One of the most important and influential relationships you will ever have is the one you create with yourself. If you feel exhausted, ragged, and worn down, it is really challenging to move from that place to one that has energy for positive parenting, and a negative cycle can easily suck you into frustrated outbursts, arguments, and short-tempers. Begin by giving yourself what you need to be the kind of person you want to be around, and your family will be better able to honor that special person who you are.

5. Define you – and accept your partner’s definition of himself. Think about what makes you tick and what gets your mind excited. My husband and I recently had a great conversation about the differences he and I have about this. He needs more time alone than I do, and has very specific ways he wants to spend this time – hunting (which he does do with the boys), working on his truck, exercising, and watching movies I just don’t get. On the other hand, I thrive on spending time with my kids as they participate in activities, gardening and yard-work, writing, and trying new recipes in the kitchen.

6. Exercise. Sigh. I know it sounds mundane, but hear me out. Exercise is great for your body, can improve your self-image, will give you more energy (in the long-run), and sets a great example for your kids. When I exercise also don’t have to carry on conversations about things like the reasons why we are not using the stairs for an indoor sledding hill – I’m puffing and grunting too much to make conversing worthwhile for anyone. Bonus!

7. Treat yourself in small ways each day. I treat myself with a cup (or 5) of tea, phone calls and emails with friends, and a hot bath on a cold MN night, new favorite book in hand. Some days I even go wild and crazy and leave my kids in the children’s wing of the library and go to the adult section and find what I would love for my own bedtime story. Find small ways that give you what you need each day to help you remain true to yourself, and your children will have a calmer, more loving and capable parent.

My parents once told me about a décor sign that made them chuckle – parenting is like being pecked to death by a chicken. Some days it just feels like that! All parents, whether working full-time outside of the home, stay-at-home mammas, or work-at-home dads, need to recharge. I hope I won’t have to resort to requesting quiet time in the cab of the truck anytime soon, but you never know!

How do you recharge as a parent?

Related posts:

1. When Your Teen Pushes Your Buttons – Communication Strategies for Parents
2. 7 Childhood Development Strategies For Raising A Go-Getter
3. Preventing The Downward Spiral – 6 Steps for Parents of Teens

WAHM.com

WAHM.com is one of the most popular sites for work-at-home moms, and it covers a wide variety of employment types, from cloud commuting in the business world to running home day-cares. One of the perks of this site is for work-at-home moms who want to find out whether or not an online job is legitimate or not. Moms can ask questions and get feedback before pursuing questionable jobs, and there are also recommended jobs available. It provides a great way to connect with other WAHMs and find useful tips for networking.

Home Business Magazine

The Home Business Magazine is a valuable resources available both in print and digital form, and includes articles about real people working from home. While it is not specifically geared toward work-at-home moms, but adults in general, it does include extensive information on everything from technology know-how to financing options to ways to balance it all at home.

Volunteer Opportunities

This one might puzzle you, but don’t be too skeptical. If you are a work-at-home mom or want to pursue that path, volunteering in the community serves three great purposes. The first is that it gives you an endeavor outside of the home where you can feel you are contributing to the community and it gives you a humbling way to recharge your batteries. The second is less obvious. It is an amazing way to network and learn more about opportunities in your area, often with professionals in your community. The boards and donators of many local non-profits are also often established business owners and managers. The third benefit of volunteering for work-at-home moms is that you can keep your skills fresh or learn new ones to add to your resume. As a writer and editor I use my skills to help non-profits with publishing, but the possibilities are endless with whatever career you are pursuing.

Larger Local Businesses

Connecting to larger local businesses in your area as a business person is not only valuable for networking, but can provide you with more options for outsourced work and telecommuting. Sometimes it is just a matter of letting someone within the company know you are available to work from home by completing a formal job application and indicating so. Businesses can benefit from outsourcing because they save on insurance costs and you don’t require your own office space.

Comrades at Home

Birds of a feather flock together, and this is sometimes epitomized when moms get together and their “real jobs” are discussed. I’ve been all 3 – a working mom, a stay-at-home mom, and a work-at-home mom. Currently I homeschool my children, am the domestic engineer of our household (it even says so on my coffee cup), and work part-time at home as a writer and editor. Having worn all three hats at some point in my mothering journey, I can attest that moms can be quite defensive and judgmental when it comes to the definition of work. I feel fortunate that I have wandered all of these roads at some point so that I have the perspectives I have now. But no matter which path you choose as a mom, it is important to have allies.

Work-at-home moms need thick skins and good friends. It is almost impossible for someone who hasn’t taken on this type of role to understand how it feels to intertwine business and family. The lines of a home office can become very blurred, and it is important to have allies who know what it is like to have children waiting outside the door while you finish a phone call, or the immense peace that comes over you when it is finally quiet at 11:00p.m and you can get some work done. If you are a work-at-home mom, make sure you surround yourself with supportive friends who share similar challenges and triumphs.

• Attend chamber meetings and small business meetings in your community to meet others.
• Join online forums where you can discuss anything from how to get dinner ready while preparing invoices or how to type with one hand and snuggle a baby with the other.
• Hang a notice at your local library inviting other work-at-home moms to meet for coffee once a month.
• Trade off with other work-at-home moms on things like driving the kids or a quiet afternoon once a week to do errands or work.
• Be supportive – of all moms.

Related posts:

1. Surviving and Thriving as the New Generation Work-at-Home Mom
2. The Wars of the Work-at-Home Mom
3. How to Find Work-at-Home Jobs Online

Watching a news clip recently reminded me about the importance of encouraging our children to become entrepreneurs. Carl Schramm, co-president of the Kaufman Foundation, reports that it is encouraging news that there is “huge enthusiasm among kids to start businesses.” This enthusiasm, while not enough to immediately improve the economy, is vital for the future of developing businesses in this country. Suddenly I feel a little pressure to make sure that as a parent I don’t squash one iota of entrepreneurial spirit that my kids are displaying.

Help Kids to Chase Their Entrepreneurial Dreams

No pressure. Just the fate of the modern world balancing on our shoulders to help raise children who can successfully become entrepreneurs – be their own bosses and make their marks in the world, all while positively impacting the national and global economy. OK – there doesn’t need to be that much pressure, but parents do need to be that support system that will allow kids to become entrepreneurs.

Encourage the spirit. If you have a child who wants to sell lemonade, homemade stickers, old baseball cards, or even pet rocks, encourage him to try. Even if the thought of running your own business is foreign or unappealing to you, give room for your child to explore this option.

Don’t stop your child from failing. Failure is one of the best teachers in life. Eons ago during my own childhood my older sister (I think she was about 6) wanted to earn money. Her grand plan was to sell newspapers. Old newspapers from a rusty red wagon. And we were the second to last house on a dead-end country road, and weren’t allowed to leave the end of the driveway. But my parents let her load her wagon with every old newspaper she could find and pace the driveway. Of course no customers ever came, but she learned that not all plans work as dreamed, but it doesn’t mean you have to stop dreaming. If you don’t let your child fail, she won’t know how to improve her approach and plans next time.

Help find answers. You don’t have to be a small business owner to teach your child how to be an entrepreneur. Help them learn how to find answers to their questions. Start with the library, your local small business association, and Better Business Bureau. There are some great books geared toward kids, such as Kidbiz: Everything You Need to Know to Start Your Own Business.

Be a subtle guiding hand. When my daughter wanted to prepare and sell dog treats to raise money for a non-profit, I was concerned about the legal issues. I suggested she contact the FDA, who in turn steered her to the USDA. At first she was told she could do this as long as 100% of the proceeds went to the non-profit. It turns out this was a learning curve for her and her contact with the USDA however, as she was later contacted and told she could bake and sell nothing – not even at an old fashioned craft and bake sale. Apparently there are more strict guidelines on dog food than on some human foods! While she was extremely disappointed, she learned a valuable lesson about the intricacies of the law and the importance of covering your business basics.

Teach your child some lessons about finances. You don’t need to dictate how and where to spend the money, both for supplies and from profit, but you should start with some real world examples of expenses and income. If your child needs start-up money make sure that you only provide it in the form of a loan to be paid back upon first profits earned or through other specific means if the venture would fail. These are real plans with real consequences – real life teaching real money management lessons.

Who Becomes an Entrepreneur?

Perhaps it is because we homeschool our kids that they are used to independent processes, or they see me work-at-home part-time and are drawn to the flexibility and rewards of it. Maybe it is because they have seen their father run his own part-time business from home that they can’t imagine a career completely dictated by someone else.

While I never set out to directly teach my kids to have an entrepreneurial sense, it does appear that I have fallen precisely into the statistics. Reports indicate that the anatomy of entrepreneurs is very much mirrored in my home. The typical adult entrepreneur is married, has children, and a solid educational foundation, and does not necessarily come from a home where parents were entrepreneurs. Research also shows that parents do play a role in at least encouraging their kids to explore the possibilities of running their own companies.

Preparing our kids for their futures and their future possibilities as entrepreneurs is no easy task. I guess I had better prepare for more worm farms (yes – one son has done that) and online marketing. The future of the economy depends on it. Gulp.

Related posts:

1. Raising Your Daughter to be Superwoman
2. Are You Raising an Overprotected Wimp?
3. Tips for Raising a Confident Child

You’ve waited for months to deliver and cherish your new baby. The crib has been assembled, the diapers are stacked, and the booties line the drawer. Everything is ready – except for your bag for the hospital. Just what are you supposed to pack for one of the most physically demanding, emotionally amplified, wonderful moments of your life?

The Basic Must Haves

Keep an envelope or file folder ready to go with some of the boring, but necessary information. You never know when you might start labor so keep this file in an obvious, accessible place to help ease the process. For my first child I didn’t even realize I was in labor and I went to my regular doctor appointment – he sent me right to the hospital and I had to scramble directions together over the phone for family members as to where to find everything at my house. Other basic requirements for your folder include:

• Insurance card and any required precertification papers
• Photo ID (some hospitals and birthing centers also require labor coaches to show ID)
• A complete list of contact information, including your partner’s or labor coaches contact numbers and a list of who to call to share the great news
• A separate set of instructions for anyone who you are having check on the house, the pets, or care for your other children while you are at the hospital
• Birth plan

For Mom’s Bag

You’ve planned for months how you hope this moment will transpire and have maybe created a birth plan to help facilitate the experience. Your bag should include everything you need for delivery and the day or two before you take your new baby home.

• Eyeglasses and contact supplies
• Toothbrush and paste
• Soap and shampoo – use mild, unscented soap, especially if you plan to nurse so you don’t irritate your baby’s senses
• Deodorant
• Hair brush, barrettes, and ponytail holders
• Sanitary pads – while the hospital can provide these, they are usually not the brand or fit that you would choose on your own (just remember that your flow will most likely be heavier than a normal period)
• Nursing pads – even if you don’t plan to breastfeed you will go through a period of engorgement and need the coverage for leaking
• Slippers and socks
• Underwear – extra pairs you can throw away if they become too stained from blood
• Nursing bras
• Pajamas – if you are planning to breastfeed consider ones that button in the front
• Bathrobe
• Comfortable clothes for the hospital – By day 2 at the hospital I always preferred by own comfortable clothes than pajamas
• Comfy outfit for taking baby home – consider layers as your body will be adjusting to fluctuating hormone levels and you may go through hot and cold flashes
• Pillow – use a colorful case so it doesn’t get confused with hospital issue cases
• Music or other comfort measures
• Picture or item for focusing on during labor

For Partner’s Bag

Your partner or labor coach will need their own little supply bag for the delivery. My husband always left those details up to me, but he was glad for the extra supplies when the days got longer than anticipated.

• Swimsuit – you may want a water labor or even just to shower while in labor
• Change of clothes – you never know how long labor will last or what your partner might be doing when you go into labor (I had a friend whose construction-working husband showed up at the hospital with his orange vest and coveralls on!)
• Money for vending machines and other minimal purchases
• Cameras and battery charges, and explicit instructions on when and where you want those cameras aimed!
• Snacks like gum, mints, oranges, and protein bars
• A copy of your birth plan
• A copy of contact information

The Extras

After our first child there were a few extras I always packed in my bag.

• Gifts for older siblings to receive when they come to meet the newest member of the family – I made t-shirts for them pronouncing their new roles as Big Sister and Big Brother and a special gift
• Pictures of older siblings that I taped to the inside of the hospital bassinet (so when older siblings come they feel they have a special place)
• A gift for the new baby that the older siblings chose – My 8-year-old still has his small teddy bear that was waiting in the bassinet for his birth
• A baby book – you might feel exhausted from labor or you might sit up all night staring at your precious child. I always took a few moments to record those emotions and details that I always wanted my children to know about their true first birthday.
• Thank you cards – there will be a good chance that you might get flowers in your room or have visitors stop by to congratulate your family. Get those thank you notes done right away, and while your baby is still blissfully sleeping away.

Your labor and delivery probably won’t go exactly as hoped or planned, so probably the single most important thing you bring with you to the hospital is acceptance. Accept that your body will do amazing and sometimes crazy things. Accept that you will wish things could go a little faster, easier, or with less pain, but that in the end you will have your beautiful baby in your arms.

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Working from home became my end goal as two things happened: my children grew older and my expense lists grew longer. Add into those things a yearning for contributing more to the family finances and the sense of accomplishment that brings to me and I began my journey. Deciding to pursue working from home, often while also raising children, is a large enough decision by itself. Deciding, it turns out, is the easier job – find the work can be more challenging.

Cloud commuting is the modern twist on telecommuting. Where is once seemed a luxury to spend an extra day or two working at home each week instead of commuting to the office, cloud commuting means the home is the office, and often the client and the provider never meet in other than the virtual world. While this is a strange, convoluted notion for my grandmother, it is the opportunity that my mother never had. It is the ability to work at home, on my own schedule, and around the lives of my family – who are still my top priority.

First 3 Steps for Working at Home

There are important lessons I have learned over the years when it comes to working from home on the cloud commuting bus, and doing it without losing my sanity or wasting my time. The first 3 steps that can help you develop your plan include:

1. Make goals. You won’t be able to make decisions if you don’t know the purposes for making them.
2. Determine a minimum amount of money you need or want to contribute to the finances – realistically.
3. Determine a maximum of hours you can spend working from home, including paperwork, invoices, and seeking or maintaining connections.

These 3 steps are essential to working at home as a cloud commuter successfully. If you determine that you want to earn $1000 each month, you need to compare that with how many hours you can devote each week to reaching that goal. Stay at home moms and dads are busy people. I have met many who don’t feel they have any more than 12 hours each week to spend working from home. This calculates into 48 hours each month. In order to earn $1000 in one month, you would need to find a job that pays roughly $21/hour. Now that you have your goals set, it is time to move on to finding those jobs.

Getting Ready to Work from Home

Update your resume and portfolio. Legitimate employers will want to see your resume, work history, or work samples. They probably won’t ever meet you in person, so they need to make sure that your virtual version is capable.

If you earned a degree long before the kids came along, go back and add in those additional skills and experiences you have acquired since, including things like CPR training, leadership certificates you earned through church, or classes you helped teach through community education. They fill in gaps on your resume and show a continued interest in education.

Make a list of targeted job possibilities. These could range from anything in the following:

• Computer programmer
• App developer
• Ad copy writer
• Transcriptionist
• Ghostwriter
• Blogger
• Editor/proofreader
• Tutorial services
• And an endless list of cloud commuting possibilities

Searching for Online Work

For many parents who stay home and try to pursue additional work (this time paid), the first place they turn is the internet. While there are a host of possibilities and options, not all are legitimate, and many don’t pay nearly enough to provide you with the means to reach your goal.

Be careful. Potential employers who ask for your money in order to proceed through a hiring a process are not going to be your ticket to financial freedom. Be wary of employers who advertise “no experience necessary” and who don’t actually tell you what you are going to be asked to do. Legitimate companies and employers will want to make the most of their advertising dollar and bring in people who best fit their needs.

Think back. When I decided that I wanted to pursue working from home on a more regular, consistent basis, I went back way too many years to count and reached out to my one client I met while in college. I let him know that I was ready for editing work if he needed any completed, and asked him to spread my name and contact information if he heard of colleagues who were searching for editing services as well. This was my little nudge that got the ball rolling and the editing work trickling in, and for new clients I met through my original contact. All of this was done online, in my cloud commuting world.

Set yourself up for success. Make sure that you have the tools necessary to complete your work as efficiently as possible. One distinct difference between working in an office and working from home is that you have to create your own space that supports your goals. Make sure your computer has the programs you need, you have peripherals like printers and faxes, and your workspace is organized. You don’t want to fumble through your grocery lists and PTA forms to find the information a client needs.

Be ready to be rejected. Don’t expect to apply for a job that meets your financial and time commitment needs and be accepted on the first try. Just as you are searching for that perfect work-at-home job, so are millions of other people. In the cloud commuting world you are also competing on an international level, and your expectations for payment might not be anywhere near the going rates in other countries.

Be open to starting out small, but ready to quickly move ahead. As you compete in a global online job market community you need to be open to the possibility of taking on a lower-end job just to get your name, experience, and virtual ranking established. Don’t keep a habit of this though, or potential clients can see that you are willing to work for little and won’t be jumping up to give you more.

While there are many sites that cater to those wanting to join the ranks of cloud commuters, sometimes the best bet is to contact trustworthy employers directly. Don’t underestimate the power of networking, and keep pounding on those virtual doors. If you are stuck on getting started, try some of the following sites, but beware of scammers and low-ball job bidding.

• guru
• oDesk
• Elance
• iFreelance
• gofreelance

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1. How to Work at Home with Teenagers in the House
2. Surviving and Thriving as the New Generation Work-at-Home Mom
3. The Wars of the Work-at-Home Mom

For me that meant treading down the path of homeschooling. While my intentions were to help my daughter, and soon the sons who followed, to learn as much as possible about life, I ended up being the one who learned invaluable lessons along the way. Homeschooling is not an easy road paved with books, quiet mornings at home learning Latin, or a sheltered life free of societal pressures. In order to homeschool well I have found 15 imperative rules that help keep this education choice working for us.

1. Love being with your kids. You will spend a good deal of time with your children, and if you find yourself thinking that 4-8 hours a day of adult conversations or interactions is what you need to be content – homeschooling is not for you.
2. Learn about your state’s laws and regulations. Many states have homeschooling groups that monitor legislative changes and can help answer questions. Some families choose to connect with the Homeschool Legal Defense Association (HSLDA), a national advocacy program for homeschoolers.
3. Follow the law. Nothing is more irritating to me than parents who know the law and don’t think it applies to them. Sure – it might be just one more form to fill out, but I consider it the least I can do when I look at the struggles that people fought just to make homeschooling legal in the United States. If you think the law in your state needs to change – do something about it. In my state our homeschool laws have become less restrictive and demanding, all due to the efforts of parents who have pushed for change within the confines of the law.
4. Be ready to say, “I don’t know” and learn along with your kids. It is better to admit that you don’t have all of the answers than to partially invest in their education. There are times when my kids, especially those in high school, ask a question I can’t fully answer with information – from science experiments to the random “Where and when was the first road built in our town?” But I do answer it by telling them what I know to be true, what I think might be the case, and what we can do to find the complete answers together.
5. Be prepared to hear the sounds your children make – all of the time. They will chatter, they will giggle, and they will just make noise. Homeschooling is not for those who cherish silence. I do own ear plugs for a reason, but those are usually on reserve for dire moments of deadlines looming.
6. Be proud of it. Children take our cues from us, and it is a great opportunity to teach others about homeschooling. There will be questions, but if you answer those with pride, especially in front of your children, you will teach your kids and those around you that homeschooling is a valid, productive choice for education. 
7. Find a support group. You will need the support group, not because homeschooling is something to overcome, but because there is strength in numbers. I couldn’t find a support group when I started, so I formed my own by placing an ad in the paper – seriously. We went from 6 families at the first meeting to more than 180 in our area. We share field trips, gym time, art classes, park days, and moms’ night out.
8. Get your partner on board. Homeschooling can be challenging enough, but if your partner has his doubts it can make your efforts even more difficult. There will be days when you struggle and having a back-up person will be essential.
9. Plan financially. Homeschooling doesn’t have to cost a fortune, but by the mere fact that one or more parents are committing to directing a child’s education, there will be time invested in the educational process that won’t be able to be invested in a career. Parents of older kids can sometimes swing work and homeschooling, but often even a part-time job is difficult to maintain while effectively homeschooling. I do work part-time from home, and it has its own benefits and drawbacks.
10. Maintain a good relationship with your school. Unless you have a crystal ball that actually works, you can’t predict the future. As much as you might want to know that you will always homeschool, you can’t predict that reality. If you storm out of the principal’s office as you pull your 7^th grader out of school to homeschool, that burned bridge might be hard to repair if your child ever wants to go back or if your life situation changes and it becomes a necessity. Maybe it will just be the fact that your child, like mine, wants to participate in school sports. Keep a good relationship so all of these options can be open without tension.
11. Don’t select a singular, expensive curriculum package your first year. Give yourself time to get to know your child’s learning styles and experiment with different pieces of curriculum. Find another mom who has the book you’re considering and see if you can borrow it for a couple of weeks to see if it is the right fit.
12. Be flexible. Your child’s learning styles, interests, abilities, and goals will evolve, and it is essential to adapt to those changes. If one science curriculum was a great fit with the first 2 children it doesn’t mean that your 3^rd will react to it the same way.
13. Find a schedule that works for you. Some families choose to follow the public school calendar so that when neighborhood friends are off for vacation their kids can run through the yards with them. Some families have a less formal plan they follow all year, while some dedicate 6 weeks on and 2 weeks off as a rotating schedule year-round. We prefer to start in the fall, have 4 planned days of lessons or activities, and use Friday as our catch-up day. The kids might work on a project, we might take a field trip, or just use the time to be a family. Schedules can depend on specific state requirements, so always make sure you check with those first.
14. Give yourselves options. People inevitably ask, “How long do you plan to homeschool?” to which we have always said “As long as it works.”  So far it has worked long enough for our oldest to start college. We never wanted our kids to look back and say, “I wish you would have let me try public school.” Parents also shouldn’t continue homeschooling if they aren’t enjoying the process, because their kids will pick up on it and the family unit will suffer.
15. Know why you are doing it. When you stay focused and you know why you are homeschooling, you keep your goals in sight. My goals are many: teach my children how to learn, show them the love of learning, allow them to be individuals who pursue their passions, help them overcome hurdles, and grow together as a family. Homeschooling is my path to reaching these individualized academic and life goals with my kids. What path are you travelling and how are you getting there?

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Toddlers and preschoolers are some of the busiest people on the planet. They want to explore, investigate, and test the edges of their knowledge of how things work. If you’re a parent of these young bundles of exploratory energy, you know how challenging it can be to get your work done while they stay engaged and content, especially without turning on the television to babysit them. Whether you are a stay-at-home mom or work-at-home mom (or dad!), there are a few tricks to keep up your sleeve when it comes to TV-free activities for little ones that will let you have a few extra minutes to get things done.

Camp in the Living Room

Use extra sheets and chairs to build a tent with your kids in the living room, or invest in a nylon pop-up tent. Keep a box of kid friendly camping supplies ready that include flashlights, LED lanterns, books with wildlife pictures and stories, and some inexpensive plastic bug toys. Let the kids add pillows and a favorite stuffed animal to the mix and they are ready to camp while you get the kitchen cupboards clean, pay bills, or do some table filing.

Play Floor Games

It can be hard on rainy or cold days to entertain the kids inside, but bringing a little outside fun inside will help keep them moving and let you have a few minutes to fold laundry. Use painters’ tape to create hop scotch grids, 4-square grids, and other games on the floor. Instead of throwing rocks for hop-scotch, give the kids a milk jug lid or bean bag to toss. For 4-square, use a balloon or inflatable beach ball instead of a playground ball or basketball. For toddlers even just running two parallel lines of tape across the floor can give them a safe place to practice balance – have them skip, slither, or walk on tip-toes along the lines.

Open a Box of Treasures

When my kids were younger I always kept a box of treasures I only pulled out when absolutely necessary – guests were coming for dinner and I still had play clay stuck in my hair or the kitchen looked like something exploded in it – yesterday. I kept small toys, games, and craft supplies in the box that I would collect at thrift stores, after Christmas clearance, and from friends who were cleaning house. Sometimes I would make a game of it and let the kids have 30 seconds to choose a game, or I would select one for them. Things like a baby doll, toy motorcycle, puzzle, book of silly faces, or new jar of craft model clay can provide 15 minutes of fun for the kids and valuable Mom time. The treasures go back into the box for another day at the end of the 15 minutes.

Make a tunnel – Listen to your kid’s need to crawl and explore and make a tunnel with pillows or use one of those play tunnels designed for kids (or in our case now, dog agility). Snake the tunnel in your work space and let the kids bring their toy cars, stuffed frogs, or rubber snakes into the tunnel and race them through it with them. It keeps kids moving and takes just a few minutes put away.

Add music – If you’re trying to sweep or dust, dance around and do it to music and get your little ones hopping to the beat. It makes the chore more enjoyable for both of you!

Use a kitchen timer – If you need 10 minutes to finish a project while your son stays busy, let him know that for 10 minutes it is his time to build with blocks while you finish your project. Setting a timer will help him know that there is an end game in sight and at the end of 10 minutes your attention will be back on him. Stick with your word and make sure that after the 10 minutes you engage him in play or an activity. You can always grab another 10 minutes later – don’t try to set a timer for 60 minutes and expect him to be content.

Dump out the toy box – My little ones loved nothing more than when I would literally tip the toy box upside down and let them have at it. There were always treasures at the bottom that they couldn’t get to with their own shorter arms. The mess can be dumped back in if you don’t have time or energy to sort it, and they will likely be content to investigate whatever has been lurking and lost at the bottom.

Give them a job – While it might not sound like fun, toddlers and preschoolers are much more likely to be content if they know they have something to do. Give them the task of dusting the table, and then fashion a miniature duster from a clothespin clipped to a small square of a paper towel that they can use to dust their doll furniture.

Give them a camera – Keep an inexpensive digital camera on hand that your little ones can use to document their day. Have them take pictures of you working, their toys ready for a new game, or their cat sleeping on their bed. Just before Dad comes home, help them print the pictures and make a poster of their day.

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