When my first child was just several months old I did what so many working women do – I stopped breastfeeding because I just didn’t feel capable of doing both. Even though I worked for a very large company, there were no policies for breastfeeding moms, no places in which to discreetly pump during the day, and no extended breaks allowed in order to feed my daughter if she was brought to the office. There were no mothers in my circle of friends and co-workers who breastfed after returning to work, if at all. I felt as if I had failed in that one job that as a mother I was supposed to be able to do.

Breastfeeding, although recommended by the World Health Organization, the American Academy of Pediatrics, and other leading organization as the most complete and best way to feed infants, is still not accepted in so many modern cultures. When it is accepted, it is not always supported and encouraged.

Just as recently as December of 2011, a breastfeeding sit-in was declared in Target stores across America in response to one mother’s reports of ill-treatment after she chose to breastfeed her baby in the store. Employees apparently asked her to move from her spot in the women’s clothing section of the store where she was breastfeeding her baby, completely covered with a blanket, to an even more remote location – a dressing room.

Those who do find offense to breastfeeding appear to be most specifically adverse to it when it is done where they know it is happening. It doesn’t even have to be something that is seen – it can be as innocent as a mother swaddling her baby under a blanket where not even a single tiny toe is visible. The naysayers appear to be afraid that even a glimpse of breast flesh might be seen. Ironic, in a country where you can’t go to the mall without seeing teenagers dressed in less clothing than I wear to the beach, and where movies and television commercials are flooded with more skin than I ever revealed breastfeeding.

The Stigmas of Breastfeeding

In third world countries breastfeeding is a necessity and a completely accepted and encouraged aspect of raising children. However, in industrial nations such as the United States of America, breastfeeding is still looked at as something that is done in large part by 4 groups of moms:

• Throwback hippies (I saw this with all of the love for a generation from which I come)
• Natural pathogen moms who wouldn’t ever consider manufactured foods of any kinds
• Working moms who have more demanding things to do with their time
• Those who are too poor to purchase formula and the necessary supplies

Moms who might consider breastfeeding are often put off by several stereotypes, stigmas, and unfortunate concerns.

• Formula, like wine, is not cheap, especially the good stuff. There is an undercurrent in American society that breastfeeding is something that those who can’t afford formula choose to do.
• Breastfeeding is icky (according to some). There is a stigma that it is gross and perverted to have an infant so dependent on what society has declared to be a purely sexual body part. Our “modernized” society has melded breastfeeding and sexual imagery – two totally separate issues – and has somehow declared breastfeeding in public to be inappropriate. Yet parents can yell at their children during tee-ball games, belittle their children for not doing well enough in school, and ignore their children as they spend more time texting than talking. Somehow our definition of inappropriate has gone askew.
• Breastfeeding reduces your social life. Nothing says “new mom” like when you are out with friends to dinner and a baby nearby begins to cry and you spring a leak in a natural response.
• Breastfeeding your baby means you won’t be able to return to work at full capacity and pursue career goals with vigor.

Yes – there are unfortunately some truths to these stigmas, but only because society hasn’t caught up to reality. They shouldn’t be stigmas and issues that stop moms from providing this wonderful and natural source of nutrition for their babies.

• Breastfeeding does mean restructuring your social life – but so does becoming a parent in general. Good friends at dinner won’t think less of you if you need to pump-n-dump – those who do probably aren’t worth dinner plans anyway.
• Even though the laws are changing, they are still not current with world health opinions and endeavors. Working outside of the home will be more challenging as a breastfeeding mom. You will need to plan ahead and let your employer know how often you will need to pump and work with your employer to find a suitable place to do this and store the milk. It won’t always be easy, but it will be worth your time and your infant’s health and relationship with you. Don’t let it be something you regret like I do.

When my 2^nd child was just days old I became very ill with a high fever and signs of a bacterial infection, and was told I needed to be hospitalized for a round of IV antibiotics. I immediately saw my hopes and plans of breastfeeding for at least the first year of his life begin to fail as I hadn’t even been able to breastfeed long enough to establish a pattern with my newborn – until my stubborn Irish side kicked in and I refused to be admitted to the hospital without my son allowed in my room so I could breastfeed. The hospital staff relented and I was admitted for 3 days of treatment with him at my side.

That baby, and his brothers who followed, were all breastfed for at least the first year of their lives, despite the roadblocks and stigmas that modern society tends to place on the choice. Don’t let the breastfeeding backlash stop you from providing your child with the best nutritional and developmental start possible – even if you aren’t Irish.

Related posts:

1. Using Kangaroo Mother Care to Support Breastfeeding
2. Breastfeeding in Public – How to Make It Work
3. Breastfeeding: Challenging and Really Doable

Bedding
Gone are the days of frilly bumper pads and thick matching quilts. The new baby bedding trends are about safety. Bumper pads are no longer recommended as they can pose strangulation and entrapment dangers for babies, and the American Academy of Pediatrics warns parents not to place blankets or stuffed animals in the cribs as well. All of the new moms who dreamed of beautiful crib ensembles don’t have to settle for just plan sheets, however. On the list of fun to try pieces are new fitted sheets like these that have added designs on the sides to mimic a lower look of a bumper pad, but it can also alert you to whether or not the sheet is fitted properly.

Bottles
Gone are the old days of glass bottles that wouldn’t survive a day at baby gym glass. If you are considering bottle-feeding, even part of the time, you also may have heard about the risks of using plastic bottles. There are many studies that question the safety of BPA (Bisphenol A), a compound found in many plastics, including baby bottles. There are current debates about the health and safety of infants exposed to this chemical through bottles.

The new look for babies and parents are stainless steel baby bottles. The push for these is across several levels, including the “green” choice of the product that can be recycled, the durability of the material, and the freedom from BPA found in plastics. Stainless steel bottles and sippy cups can also be easier to clean and safer in the long-run because their scratch-resistant surfaces don’t allow for areas in which bacteria can grow.

Induced Lactation
Adoptions and surrogate parents bring joy to parents and help create new families, but often did not offer the possibilities of non-birth parents breastfeeding. Now some pediatricians offer cocktails of hormones and supplements that are designed to mimic the hormones of pregnancy. Also known as adoptive breast-feeding, the general idea is derived from the wet nurses of centuries gone by. Not all parents are opting for the prescription pad when it comes to this feeding option, as some lactation consultants recommend herbal teas and round the clock breast pumping to stimulate breast-milk production. This, however, is usually not as successful in producing the quantity of milk necessary to sustain feeding a healthy newborn, but it does provide parents with the ability to form this close bond as well as pass along helpful antibodies.

High Tech Baby Monitors
There is an app for everything! My first baby monitor could double as low-budget eavesdropping technology as it picked up conversations of other moms and kids in the neighborhood. Now parents can plug in their iPads and phones and use them as baby monitors at a moment’s notice. Not all apps have video, but as long as you can hear your little one snoozing or screaming, it probably doesn’t matter in the long run. This means one less thing to pack for the trip to Grandma’s, too.

The Extras

• Apps for keeping tabs on the ins and outs – the milk and the poo – so you will never have to ask yourself again, “When was the last time he…?”
• Ear scopes that parents can safely use to check for the source of that screaming pain, such as this one, can provide back-up in the middle of the night when you just aren’t sure. After watching one son suffer through tremendous ear problems, I know that gadgets like these can help get to the source quickly (but always check with your doctor with questions!).
• Attachments for your strollers just for your phone so your beverage holder doesn’t get lonely!

At the end of the day, so many of the gadgets and gizmos we surround our babies with don’t give what they really need most – our time and attention. There is no app for the nurturing bonds we can provide as we snuggle with our babes, listen to their heartbeats in person, and pay attention to the subtle signals they give us for their needs. If they ever make apps to replace those moments, I don’t want one anyway!

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3. How to Choose a Baby Name (That Your Mother-In-Law Won’t Hate)

You’ve waited for months to deliver and cherish your new baby. The crib has been assembled, the diapers are stacked, and the booties line the drawer. Everything is ready – except for your bag for the hospital. Just what are you supposed to pack for one of the most physically demanding, emotionally amplified, wonderful moments of your life?

The Basic Must Haves

Keep an envelope or file folder ready to go with some of the boring, but necessary information. You never know when you might start labor so keep this file in an obvious, accessible place to help ease the process. For my first child I didn’t even realize I was in labor and I went to my regular doctor appointment – he sent me right to the hospital and I had to scramble directions together over the phone for family members as to where to find everything at my house. Other basic requirements for your folder include:

• Insurance card and any required precertification papers
• Photo ID (some hospitals and birthing centers also require labor coaches to show ID)
• A complete list of contact information, including your partner’s or labor coaches contact numbers and a list of who to call to share the great news
• A separate set of instructions for anyone who you are having check on the house, the pets, or care for your other children while you are at the hospital
• Birth plan

For Mom’s Bag

You’ve planned for months how you hope this moment will transpire and have maybe created a birth plan to help facilitate the experience. Your bag should include everything you need for delivery and the day or two before you take your new baby home.

• Eyeglasses and contact supplies
• Toothbrush and paste
• Soap and shampoo – use mild, unscented soap, especially if you plan to nurse so you don’t irritate your baby’s senses
• Deodorant
• Hair brush, barrettes, and ponytail holders
• Sanitary pads – while the hospital can provide these, they are usually not the brand or fit that you would choose on your own (just remember that your flow will most likely be heavier than a normal period)
• Nursing pads – even if you don’t plan to breastfeed you will go through a period of engorgement and need the coverage for leaking
• Slippers and socks
• Underwear – extra pairs you can throw away if they become too stained from blood
• Nursing bras
• Pajamas – if you are planning to breastfeed consider ones that button in the front
• Bathrobe
• Comfortable clothes for the hospital – By day 2 at the hospital I always preferred by own comfortable clothes than pajamas
• Comfy outfit for taking baby home – consider layers as your body will be adjusting to fluctuating hormone levels and you may go through hot and cold flashes
• Pillow – use a colorful case so it doesn’t get confused with hospital issue cases
• Music or other comfort measures
• Picture or item for focusing on during labor

For Partner’s Bag

Your partner or labor coach will need their own little supply bag for the delivery. My husband always left those details up to me, but he was glad for the extra supplies when the days got longer than anticipated.

• Swimsuit – you may want a water labor or even just to shower while in labor
• Change of clothes – you never know how long labor will last or what your partner might be doing when you go into labor (I had a friend whose construction-working husband showed up at the hospital with his orange vest and coveralls on!)
• Money for vending machines and other minimal purchases
• Cameras and battery charges, and explicit instructions on when and where you want those cameras aimed!
• Snacks like gum, mints, oranges, and protein bars
• A copy of your birth plan
• A copy of contact information

The Extras

After our first child there were a few extras I always packed in my bag.

• Gifts for older siblings to receive when they come to meet the newest member of the family – I made t-shirts for them pronouncing their new roles as Big Sister and Big Brother and a special gift
• Pictures of older siblings that I taped to the inside of the hospital bassinet (so when older siblings come they feel they have a special place)
• A gift for the new baby that the older siblings chose – My 8-year-old still has his small teddy bear that was waiting in the bassinet for his birth
• A baby book – you might feel exhausted from labor or you might sit up all night staring at your precious child. I always took a few moments to record those emotions and details that I always wanted my children to know about their true first birthday.
• Thank you cards – there will be a good chance that you might get flowers in your room or have visitors stop by to congratulate your family. Get those thank you notes done right away, and while your baby is still blissfully sleeping away.

Your labor and delivery probably won’t go exactly as hoped or planned, so probably the single most important thing you bring with you to the hospital is acceptance. Accept that your body will do amazing and sometimes crazy things. Accept that you will wish things could go a little faster, easier, or with less pain, but that in the end you will have your beautiful baby in your arms.

No related posts.

Renewed Focus on Breastfeeding

There is a pendulum swing again in the conversation about which type of feeding is best for your baby. For hundreds of years the mainstay option was breastfeeding. Then along came the ability of and interest in women spending time away from home, working, socializing, and being active in their communities while still being moms. In order to accomplish these other goals, moms turned to formula to supplement or replace breastfeeding.

Recently hospitals have been taking second looks at their roles in encouraging or discouraging breastfeeding, the method that is still recommended by pediatricians to be the most complete nutrition for babies. For decades hospitals in the United States have been sending home diaper bags with new moms, provided by formula producing companies, complete with starter formula kits for new moms. These same hospitals are now moving to more neutral ground, supplying moms with general information about newborn care. Hospitals are also encouraging skin to skin contact, or kangaroo care. After my own children were born our hospital staff encouraged kangaroo care to help regulate their tiny bodies’ temperature levels and promote breastfeeding.

Supportive Breastfeeding Strategies

As the healthcare industry begins to recognize that breastfeeding is possible with supportive strategies, even for busy moms who work outside the homes, it is important to keep in mind the basics that help mothers find success in breastfeeding, especially through kangaroo mother care. Some proponents of kangaroo mother care recommend almost continuous skin to skin contact, allowing for a diaper and hat for the newborn, and using a swaddle wrap to hug the baby to your chest. Others who use or recommend this method feel that it is more important to implement the strategy of regular, but not necessarily constant, skin to skin contact.

Starting Right

As soon as babies are born it is important for them to have skin to skin contact with their mothers. This helps regulate the baby’s body temperature and soothes her after the birth process. Fathers can also participate in this practice, although newborns are sometimes more sensitive to their mothers’ sounds and scents. This close contact is the foundation of the kangaroo mother care technique.

Whether the birth occurs at home, in a hospital, or a regional birthing center, keeping babies close to their mothers will help facilitate the kangaroo mother care approach. Mothers in close proximity to their infants will be more likely to quickly learn the subtle signals their newborns are making and be able to respond, implementing the kangaroo care style of interaction.

Sometimes new mothers find it challenging or awkward to begin breastfeeding. It is important for moms to relax and remain calm during the process. Breastfeeding rarely happens like in the movies – in one swift move the mother miraculously nurses her child for the first time in one flawless motion. The reality is that this is new for both of you and it will take time to figure out what works best.

Even if you are unsure about whether or not you will exclusively breastfeed or formula feed, taking time for skin to skin contact will help create that special connection between you and your child. It may even lead you to nurse when you see the reaction from your newborn.

Successful Breastfeeding

You and your baby will go through phases of success and frustration in breastfeeding. Don’t give up! Try using kangaroo mother care where you repeatedly place your child on your chest, allowing her to root around.

• Talk with a lactation consultant at your local hospital.
• Contact a La Leche League consultant to share your concerns and work on a new strategy.
• Talk with your child’s pediatrician and form a plan together.

Breastfeeding has numerous benefits for moms and babies. Getting to the point where it is a relaxed and natural feeding method is not always easy, but patience and persistence are required to get there. The kangaroo mother care approach is just one more way to connect with your baby, forming a close bond that supports breastfeeding and improved health for both of you.

Related posts:

1. Breastfeeding Backlash
2. Breastfeeding in Public – How to Make It Work
3. Breastfeeding: Challenging and Really Doable

(This is a continuation from Part I) …Latching on, proper suction, engorgement, mastitis…these are all things that usually are not talked about to new mothers.  I understand the concern of “scaring” off new moms to the idea of nursing, but, if we want these new mommas to be successful at this, then they need to be properly prepared for the possible complications that can arise during the first few months of breastfeeding.  Before we go on, just know, YOU CAN GET THROUGH IT and YOU’R NOT ALONE.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention website www.cdc.gov, 3 out of 4 new moms start out breastfeeding, which now meets the Healthy People 2010 national objective for breastfeeding initiation.  However, rates of exclusive breastfeeding at 3-6 months remain stagnant and low, and they feel the reasoning behind this is due to lack of support, preparation, and facing multiple barriers to breastfeeding.

Ladies, this is why I am writing.  To help PREPARE you for what may come, so you are not blindsided by these roadblocks, and if these issues do not arise, than you are pleasantly surprised by the ease and grace of breastfeeding.

This week I will be talking to you about Mastitis.  There are different levels of mastitis that range from mild to severe.  I was “lucky” enough to get it 5 times in the first year of my first child, and on the more severe side of the spectrum, I however, was determined to breastfeed my son until 12 months, and therefore, spent a whole lot of time at my Lactation Specialists office…she probably knows my breasts better than my husband, and I’m okay with that. Therefore, I continued to nurse until he was 24 months.

Let’s start with “what is mastitis?”  According to www.womenshealthmatters.com it is stated as “swelling and tenderness in the breast of a breastfeeding woman that may be caused by a blocked milk duct or an infection”.  Either way, it is no fun and can be quite painful, but be calm my fellow mommies, there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

Mastitis can occur any time during your breastfeeding course.  It mainly happens to first time moms and will usually show up within the first three months of nursing.  The first tell tale sign will be soreness on your breast.  It will usually be remote and within 24 hours will redden and become swollen.  This is where you infection is.  The moment you notice this…grab your baby and breastfeed exclusively on that breast.  When you can’t get baby to nurse any more, whip out your pump, get comfy, put on a chick flick and massage in small circles starting under your armpits (this is where a lot of times clogged ducts may be),  top of breast, and an inch below breast, and massage towards the nipple.

If you know exactly where it is, then massage where your swollen and try and break that sucker free.  If you notice you become feverish and your temperature spikes, go the you doctor immediately, and they may have to prescribe an antibiotic.  Sometimes (like with me), you just can’t get rid of it on your own and you may have to have a little help.  If your doctor feels you would benefit from this, just remember, you still need to nurse and pump mainly on that side (and pump to comfort on your other side so you don’t become over filled), to help clear out the infection and or clogged duct.

Mastitis can come on quick and hard, or slow and easy.  Fevers can spike to 103 fairly fast, so be aware of this and have your doctor and Lactation Consultant on speed dial.

No one can take away the special bond between you and your breastfeeding baby…not even a nasty infection.  Remember, this is the only thing that no one can take away from you…no one else can do this but you.  Anyone can give your baby a bottle with formula, but no one can give your baby the love and healthy benefits of breastfeeding, but YOU.  Enjoy it while you’ve got it.  Happy breastfeeding!

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1. Terror In Boob Central

You are now a new mom (possibly again), and nothing can take away that joyous feeling of pride as you gaze into your little ones precious eyes.  Nothing except the pain of your gigantic hard as rock boobies!  This wonderful gift from mother nature to generally, first time moms (however, I was blessed with having it with both my babies) will be your first (and hopefully only) road block as a breastfeeding mommy.

Engorgement usually sets in within the first few days of having baby and lasts for a grueling 72 whopping hours.  This may not sound very long, but as your breasts swell, ache, harden, and heat up, it may feel like 72 day engorgement.  But fear not mommies!  For I am here to help you through this.  You can think of me as your breasts guardian angel.

First of all, to get through engorgement, you must understand whats going on with your once, “fun bags”.  The most common misconception that I have come across with  people is that engorgement is an over abundance of milk, or that your milk is stuck.  It actually isn’t your milks fault at all!  Engorgement is when the tissue surrounding your beast is inflamed…so feel free to break out the ibuprofen ladies.

You may use compresses, but you should swap out between warm and cool water.  It is very important to make sure you are not using hot water, as this can make inflammation worse, that being said, it is equally important not to use too cold of water either.  Any major change of temperature may cause a negative result.  The compresses are to be used for comfort.

Now, if you are like me and when it comes to breastfeeding, Murphy’s Law tends to come into effect, you may experience a milk production problem as well, or your breasts may have swollen so much it has caused your nipples to go flat so baby cannot properly latch on, then read on my friends…read on.

In these cases, it is important to stay calm, and try hard to relax.  If you are having let downs but nothing is coming out, and you can start to feel your ducts filling up and your areolas are hardening, then you might want to try breast massage.  It is likely that your swollen tissue is creating blockage to your nipple from your ducts.  This next step is not for the faint at heart.  It requires diligence, even if it starts to become a little uncomfortable.

With both hands on one breast, take the pads of your finger tips and put them on either side of your nipple (like your going to dig) and gently, but firmly push in and then out towards your arm pit with one hand and towards the inside of your cleavage with the other.  In doing this, you are moving the swollen tissue out of the way. Do this in every angle on both nipples until areola softens and latch that little baby on.  If your nipples have gone flat at this point, I would use a nipple shield until the nipple protrudes enough for baby to latch on by herself.

If you are having on going complications with breastfeeding, then contact your local Lactation Consultant or Breastfeeding Counselor.  Breastfeeding is the best thing for you and your baby and even though it may seem like a whole lot of work, it is so worth it, and I promise that some day in the near future, your boobies will once again, be your “breast friends”.

You can read Part II here

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1. Terror In Boob Central Part II

Certainly not, loving Dad!

The truth is, fathers also benefit by breastfeeding. Savings from not having to buy formula and not spending for more trips to the doctor for things like ear infections are things the whole family enjoys since it can mean more budget for food or other nice-to-haves. A child’s good health also gives a father peace of mind, not just the mother. It should also make Dads everywhere happy that cancer risks are reduced for their children and wives. So, definitely, fathers also have much to contribute to breastfeeding in terms of support.

A lot of mothers fail to breastfeed exclusively because they lacked the emotional crutch to keep going. That is where Daddies come in. Fathers can help in many ways:

Attend breastfeeding seminars with your wife.

Not only would you appreciate how compromising it can be for your wife, but you would also get to appreciate the magic behind the science of breastfeeding. It really is amazing that your wife’s milk production will adjust to your baby’s needs and how the milk components change when there is a threat of infection in the air. You will also learn to provide your wife with enough pillows, or cheer her when she’s down. My husband actually started coaching other Moms on the right breastfeeding positions on our second seminar.

Support her decision to room-in.

Don’t let your groggy wife have to remind you to inform the doctors of your decision to room-in. Contact the nurses and doctors yourself. In the meantime, learn from them too while you’re at it. Learning to swaddle, change, and clean the baby while your wife is still recovering herself will give her more energy to breastfeed.

Perform other care giving tasks.

This is especially crucial in the first few weeks after delivery because the Mom is still weak and her hormone levels are crashing. She could be exhausted and prone to tears. While you cannot breastfeed, you can burp the baby after. You can also bounce, change, sun and also provide the skin to skin contact a newborn needs to thrive some more. Your wife then can catch more winks and you need not wait to bond with your newborn.

Generate more help and support.

Is the wife complaining of engorgement? Look up the possible reasons and solutions. Make sure she doesn’t miss her post-natal checkups. Get your mother and her mother, or neighbors and friends, to cook something wonderful and healthy. Get other close friends to babysit the babe to give you and the wife some time to sleep, or some alone time to just connect.

Dress her up in breastfeeding style.

Chances are, your wife will want to do the shopping herself. But you can give her gift certificates or just bring her to a shop where she can get nursing bras, nursing covers and other breastfeeding wear. And yes, she may also get more infant layette instead. But the thing is, she is saving you money from formula, remember? Plus, the right nursing wear will empower her to breastfeed in public and start leaving the house sooner.

Feed your baby with expressed breast milk.

The time will come, around two months after giving birth, that your wife will be able to produce enough supply that she can also start storing milk. Plus, she may need to go back to work already. Any chance you get, feed the baby the expressed breast milk and enjoy that same intimacy of having a baby look up happily at you while feeding.

Acknowledge her efforts.

Nothing makes a breastfeeding mother happier than to hear people say that her baby looks healthy. And you, as her partner, should be the first person she’ll hear it from. Also, thank her for her efforts and acknowledge how she must be tired from nursing all night. Ask her how you can help her be more comfortable and once in a while, give her a little token of appreciation: a card, a slice of cake, a good book, or some back rub.

Mothers need all the support they can get and husbands/partners can actually do a lot to facilitate breastfeeding success. Fathers just need to be equally empowered that they have what it takes to help. Fathers also need to be more involved in their newborn’s care for them to also reap the rewards that comes with all those nurturing. And breastfeeding, even though it has a lot to do with milk, also has more to do with love and commitment, something that a family should invest in as a team.

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1. Breastfeeding: Challenging and Really Doable
2. The Role Of The Nanny
3. Breastfeeding Backlash

First, there’s teaching the baby to latch.

Sometimes, it is as easy as bringing the baby to your breast. But sometimes, a long labor, a C-section delivery, not rooming in, having the baby bottlefed with formula at the nursery, and special circumstances can make the perfect latch harder to achieve. Women have to know that the baby should be facing her breasts and not accessing it from the side and that the baby’s mouth should be latched not just to her nipple but part of her areola as well.

Plus, it does hurt, especially initially.

I don’t think we have any body part accustomed to as much stimulation as the breasts will get during breastfeeding so it’s but logical to feel a little raw in the beginning. If you’re feeding from a bad position as well, like hunching forward or without a pillow to prop the baby up, your back will give out. And then of course, the baby will grow teeth.

And you doubt yourself.

Is the baby getting milk? Is he getting enough? Am I producing enough? Should I do anything to boost my supply? Am I feeding him often enough? Why isn’t he getting plump if breast milk is so rich? Why is he still crying? Why is he nursing all the time?

Few moms take time to know that breast milk is highly digestible. They also forget that newborn stomachs are so small; it’s easy to fill them. Put these two facts together and they will understand why newborns feed 8-12 times a day. Interestingly too, all of us have forgotten quite how it feels to be a newborn who cannot quite communicate what’s making us upset but I imagine, leaving the safe confines of our mother’s womb should be stressor enough. Newborns may also cry because of heat and cold, noise and unfamiliar smells, and sometimes, aches in their tummies. And the only thing that will comfort them is suckling from their Mom. Even my already-weaned toddler still touches base with my breasts when scared. It’s a comfort zone; a security blanket.

And others may not be as supportive as you’d wish them to be.

Your mother reminds you that you were formula fed and you turned out alright. Others suggest you mix-feed at least so your baby will grow more. Your husband is sleeping soundly while you’re up nursing. Well-meaning friends ask you if your breasts won’t sag that way. And there isn’t always a breastfeeding area when you go out.

It is up to the mother now to have reasons and facts, not necessarily to defend the decision to breastfeed but to stay committed. Knowing pregnancy and smoking and too much weight gain/loss is the culprit for breasts sagging, aside from age, of course, will help one to just laugh off friends’ comments. Finding meaning in the intimacy and bonding brought by breastfeeding to mother and child will help one understand that her own mother might just be feeling defensive about her own choices in the past. Knowing that babies can still be healthy without being round also helps mothers be at peace with their child’s body size. Also, getting as much sleep as your husband does isn’t realistic but you can still get more sleep if you master the art of nursing in the side-lying position.

Breastfeeding will always have its challenges. Sometimes you’d be scared by a pus-looking something on your nipple that really is just a milk blister. On the other hand, sometimes you’d dismiss redness in your breasts as just a rash when it’s really thrush. But arming yourself with the proper information before you actually have to nurse will make you more confident. Joining support groups if it’s something novel in your circle will also do a lot to empower you. And you will find that despite all the struggles, and every mother and child has them, breastfeeding successfully is actually possible. Questions do have answers. Problems do have solutions. And yes, most women reach a plateau where it becomes second nature.

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1. The Father’s Role in Breastfeeding
2. Breastfeeding Backlash
3. Breastfeeding in Public – How to Make It Work

“They do what!?”  I incredulously asked my best friend.  “Women’s boobs have milk and they feed their babies?  I thought boobs were…for decoration.”

I was completely turned off by the whole thing, not to mention oddly curious how milk could come out of a breast.  No way was I going to have anything to do with that in the future.  Isn’t that why bottles were invented?

My Plan for Breastfeeding

When I became pregnant for the first time, I didn’t even give breastfeeding a thought.  I was going to bottle feed, for sure.  My mother certainly agreed it was great — all seven of her children used formula, and we’re all as healthy as can be.

In my last month of pregnancy, a friend who was also pregnant at the time (and gung-ho about breastfeeding) asked me why I wouldn’t breastfeed my baby.  “I don’t know,” I said.  I knew it was a very uneducated answer, but sadly, it was the truth.  I knew all the benefits to breastfeeding, but was still weirded-out by the whole thing .  “Well, why don’t you at least try it, and if you don’t like it, then stop.”

That sounded simple enough.  I guess trying wouldn’t hurt.

Well, the day finally arrived, and after two hours of pushing, I had in front of me my very first child.  I didn’t experience that love at first sight feeling that some parents experience.  My experience was more like, “Did you really just come out of me?  You’re so. . .humanlike.  How did this all just happen?”  .  The doctor’s did their thing with him, then handed him over to me.

It was time to try nursing.  “Here we go” I said with some sarcasm in my voice. “I’m new at this too, so we’ll see how we do, okay little guy.”

Right away, my son latched on and started sucking.  I’ll admit, it was definitely weird, but in a really, really nice way.  I fell in love with nursing, right there on the spot.  It was just so. . .easy.

All thoughts of formula-feeding went straight out the door.  No thoughts of having to run to the grocery store to buy expensive formula.  No thoughts of preparing the formula, sanitizing bottles, checking temperatures, lugging bottles everywhere I would go…All gone.  It felt like such a mental relief.

So in essence, why did I choose to breastfeed?  I didn’t.  It chose me.

And I loved it!  What’s your story?  Why did you choose to breastfeed?

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One of the more serious concerns that women (and even their partners) have about breastfeeding is nursing in public. Really shy and conservative women naturally balk at the idea of baring their breasts . Husbands and boyfriends may also be concerned that other men may start staring. It’s also been reported in my breastfeeding support group that moms are actually more concerned about hitching up one’s shirt to reveal unshapely tummies for everyone to see.

So, what can one do to minimize exposure concerns?

Go to breastfeeding stations.

Malls and other big establishments have breastfeeding nooks and stations where women can nurse in peace. Consult local directories where such is available or suggest one to be made available, preferably while you’re still pregnant, in high-traffic areas like parks and shopping centers.

Don breastfeeding covers

Be resourceful with shawls and baby blankets or invest in one or two nursing covers. Many are already being sold in funky colors and designs, with choices of snaps and breathable fabric to cover you and your baby as you nurse in public. Breastfeeding covers also allow you to use old clothes and bras (if they still fit) without having to worry about exposing your tummy.

Invest in Nursing Wear

Nursing wear allows you to breastfeed discreetly wherever you are and is not limited anymore to nursing bras and camisoles. Mompreneurs everywhere have totally reinvented it and elevated it to high fashion. You can now attend formal gatherings in fabulous gowns without having to leave your baby behind or escape to the car when it is breastfeeding time. Those who can already use their old clothes can use transition tubes and belly bands instead to cover stretch marked bellies.

Use slings

A great advantage of slings over carriers is they can double as breastfeeding cover for you while your child reaps the benefits of babywearing. Choose from ring slings, pouches and different wraps and cover your breastaurants with just a pull here and there at the same cloth that is holding your baby and distributing his weight evenly around your back. Then, feel free to continue going about your business.

Practice in front of the mirror

Nurse your baby while facing a mirror to see that your baby’s head actually covers your breast. Realize too that it takes less than a second to latch, once you’ve gotten the hang of it, and it is thus less than a second of total exposure for your breasts. Make sure also to practice using your breastfeeding accessory before going out with it to avoid getting stumped while preparing to breastfeed in public. You don’t want to be figuring out snaps and hooks while your breast is already exposed and your baby is already bawling… in public, no less.

Get a better attitude

Breastfeeding is a wonderful gift you can only give your child for a short time. Its benefits are many and long-term, both for your baby and you. Don’t let your fears stop you from doing something you think is beautiful and right. Most people won’t ogle anyway and you may be surprised to see smiling, knowing faces from other people who are just as much into breastfeeding as you.

Make pumping your friend

If all of the above still don’t work for you, but you also still believe in breastfeeding and its rewards, then just invest in a good breast pump or master the art of hand expression and go out in public with expressed breast milk (EBM) in a bottle. Of course, doing so means you don’t get to enjoy a lighter diaper bag and miss an opportunity to shop (for the breastfeeding accessories).

I nursed my son in a sling while shopping for groceries. I have also breastfed him in at least three different beaches, a Christmas bazaar, public transportation, several parties and at different places at the mall. At first, I was real conscious about it which made unclasping brassiere clips harder but eventually I started not to care. And I never saw anyone staring (or maybe I just never checked if anyone was looking). I just convinced myself that nursing in public helps drive the awareness home to society which will help more moms in getting the breastfeeding support they need.

And yes, I loved the sexy, fab nursing wear I got to wear!

Related posts:

1. Breastfeeding Backlash
2. Using Kangaroo Mother Care to Support Breastfeeding
3. Breastfeeding: Challenging and Really Doable